If you are familiar, with the recovery of substance use disorder, you have probably heard someone refer to the rooms.
What do “the rooms” mean? This is a phrase commonly used to describe 12 step meetings.
People can find and keep their recovery “in the rooms”.
I would like to share my experience as a family member going in to the rooms:
It could be because I am a family member observing. Maybe, its because I can hear myself in the stories of so many others.
I do not struggle with substance use disorder. But, I do have regrets about my behavior to the ones I love.
Luckily, my neural pathways did not change. I drank alcohol many times in my younger years, yet I was one of the lucky ones, who didn’t develop a dependency.
Still, I have shame, associated with some of the choices I have made.
When you sit in a room with a dozen people, who are sharing the darkest times of their lives, something miraculous happens.
You begin to understand, the shame of others. You learn, that no matter how much love they had for others, they could not stop themselves from using the substance.
As you hear the words coming from strangers, who are willing to bare their souls, you begin to see yourself in a new light.
As an observer, I never leave a meeting with a dry eye. I am continually amazed, just how much, the human body and mind can endure.
I leave each room in awe, of the transformation that happened, to these beautiful humans. There is hope, in their stories. There is peace, in their words.
I, too, have watch myself transform in to a more peaceful, loving person.
I, too, had to be willing to admit, my way wasn’t working for me.
If you are the family member of a loved one struggling with addiction: I would like to invite you, to find an open meeting, in your area.
Walk in with an open mind. Listen to the things, each person is saying. See if there are areas of your own life, you could apply the principles to.
When it comes to our core, we are really not all that different. We can still be miserable human beings, without using substances.
We can be in denial, about our roles, in the environment we create. We can blame others for our misery, instead of taking accountability, for our own emotions and actions.
Lastly, we can work on ourselves. We can gain new knowledge and learn new skills. We can drastically change our lives and the lives of those around us.
The whole point of life is to grow, all through the years. It is to contribute to our families and society to make them better.
You may not find your experience “in the rooms” the same as I do. But, I guarantee, if you have a recovery practice, your life will improve for the better.
Your loved ones recovery, is their responsibility. Your recovery, is yours.
How will you show up for your own recovery?